I'm just sitting at my table, trying to study...
These are the conversations that are interrupting me:
Friend #1) My heart is racing and beating irregularly. (My heart, made from pig valves after open-heart surgery.) I think I'll go to Mr. Chow, anyway.
Friend #2) How can you MAKE ME DRIVE UP SUCH A HILLY ROAD WITH SO MANY TURNS when I have been throwing up. (From special K.) And I just crashed my Range Rover into a paraplegic at Whole Foods. Where can I get a juicer? I need to do the Master Cleanse.
Friend #3) I would love to go to NA meetings with you. We can talk about how you shouldn't be a hooker and I shouldn't suck dick, to be "functional" junkies. Man, I'm lucky I don't have tits or I would never stop.
Even in dextox January, I'm never going to run outta' material.
love- jem gf
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